Chronicles of Narcissism
Sep 06, 2020
Just recently I was having a conversation with a new friend. He shared with me a wonderful testimony and within the framework of some counseling that he is currently doing, there are elements that have to do with narcissism. I began to share some insight with him, and as result, I was inspired to pen a few paragraphs with regards to this sometimes hidden or not talked about much, very serious subject.
I encourage you to take a moment out of your day and read along. Perhaps some of what I am sharing will resonate with you, or maybe, you just might encounter some new knowledge with regards to narcissism that may aid you on your journey?
One of the things that I personally experienced on my journey to freedom from pathological narcissism, is that as Amy got mentally healthier, I continued to quickly spiral down the slippery slopes. My spirit was willing, but my flesh was extremely weak! Not only was it weak, it desired more depravity, because my Heart was severely sick.
The kind of sick that the word of God clearly defines in the book of Jeremiah 17:9
9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?
There are few things more terrifying and frightening to a narcissist, then when that moment arrives when he or she begins to realize that they are losing control of their victims mind. As the victim gets healthier, the narcissist typically will become more aggressive and intolerable, but by this time, the victim has learned a thing or two and has intentionally prepared an arsenal of tools and weaponry to finally, effectively, counter the deadly blows from the narcissist.
One of the worst mistakes that the victim can make as they are getting free is to succumb blindly and adopt a spirit of eliteness, or fall into the “I’ve arrived syndrome”. This kind of “Ivory Tower” mentality will certainly be short lived. As the narcissist sees the haughtiness and guile they will typically become even more hostile and intolerable.
The healthier a person becomes, the more aware they become of the tactics that the narcissist utilizes, and with proper application, the victim can actually render them powerless when the inevitable conflicts ensue, as a result of the nature of the beast.
My situation may have been unique, because as Amy continued achieving greater levels of freedom, she remained humble, and although she was acutely aware that the enemy was the enemy, and not me, she was filled with empathy and compassion for me and recognized that their was a deep earnest desire in me to be free, but I was in shackles and in desperate need of deliverance from the demons that I had capitulated to.
It was during this season of my life that Amy demonstrated to me everything that I had ever learned about Jesus. She did not gain a greater level of freedom and then just abandon me, even when her closet friends counseled her otherwise.
As a result of my condition I actually provided great writing and preaching material for Amy. I believe this was only produced because of the position that she chose to take therefore I see it as a serendipity from God.
Her view and perspective on our relationship, when others with her best interest at heart, of course was, “so using your logic, the person who made me what I am today through getting free from his narcissism is the person that I now throw away because I am healthier”?
The absolute, unwavering, intoxicating love of Jesus towards us, should in every case, drive us straight into His loving arms. I find that the most effective way to assist in helping a true narcissist get set free is first of all accepting the fact that Jesus is the only one who can accomplish the “He whom sets the son free”, in anyones life.
Establishing airtight, watertight, no breach boundaries must be executed right away and a clear understanding of the tactics utilized by the narcissist will in most case set you u for success.
The main emphasis that I place when counseling anyone who is dealing with a narcissist is that they have to be prepared to completely walk away. They must respect and value their own self worth and know that there may be a place on the journey when the narcissist refuses to own their depravity and work towards wholeness. As sad as this scenario appears, it is very realistic, and the narcissist must first be able to look at their selves in the mirror and own the fact that are sick and in need of deliverance form this awful malady.
This is the first step to FREEDOM and the initial tug at the power cord that is the “life source”, that keeps the narcissist on the seemingly never ending hamster wheel.
Anyone that is self aware, and will choose to be brutally honest with themselves about their narcissistic behaviors can be set free. I was told that I could not be set free but deep in my deep, I knew that Jesus was not white-knuckling my “unique” condition.
In my trouble I cried to the Lord, And He answered me.
Psalm 120:1
There is no unique situation, disease, addiction, demon, virus or anything else that Jesus has not already conquered. It’s really up to us whether or not we are willing to bring our particular leprosy to Him so that we can bet set free.
He is willing, are you?
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